OMA13: Cronch Brand Foods

Location: Any supermarket.

Status: Active.

Description and Behavior: Cronch Brand Foods is an anomalous food brand that manifests as a display in supermarkets. It has taken the form of chocolate bars, cereal, yogurt, milk, cheese, bread, deli meats, and cookies. While appearing to be normal food when held, when chewed it always has the consistency of styrofoam and the flavor of boiled egg whites.

When the manifested display is interacted with by a person a man will approach and greet them in a familiar manner, referring to the person as Bill if male and Mary if female regardless of their actual name. From this point deviating from the ‘script’ of this entity will have grave consequences. The ‘script’ is as follows:

Cronch Enthusiast (CE): Eh Bill/Mary, whazzup? Checking out Cronch Brand (product)?

Victim (V): (Positive affirmation)

CE: Good call! After all, Cronch Brand (product) is a good source of (nutrient) and (another nutrient)!

V: (Enthusiastic surprise)

CE: Yes! That’s why Cronch Brand (product) is sure to take a bite out of the naysayers! Well, see you later Bill/Mary! And remember, Cronch…

V: Or be Cronched!

If the script is followed to satisfaction the man will leave and disappear immediately after exiting the front doors of the supermarket. If any deviation from the script occurs at any point the man will scowl at the victim and immediately disappear. At that point a large, grotesque floating head will manifest on the other side of the supermarket and immediately make a beeline for the victim. Once reaching the victim, the head will knock them down and start eating them from the feet up. The head has strong jaws and at least five rows of teeth it uses to deliberately crush as many bones in the victim’s body as possible. Any attempts to physically damage the head have little to no effect. Nearing the end of the victim’s consumption a female voice will say, from no discernible location, “Cronch or be Cronched!”

After the event has occurred, whether the script was followed or not, a ’commercial’ of the event will be played for the friends and family of the victim when they watch television or an online video. If script was deviated from, the gruesome death of the victim will be shown in full. The people who see the commercial will be more likely to encounter Cronch Brand Foods when they go grocery shopping. Unusually for a commercial, the commercials generated by this process have credits. These credits list the roles of ‘Victim’ as played by the victim of the encounter, ‘Cronch Enthusiast’ as played by Mr. Cronch, the ‘Jaws of Justice’ as played by Zaluuth the Lesser, and the female voiceover as Catherine Cronch.

Recommended Actions: Firstly, it is recommended to avoid interacting with Cronch Brand Foods at all costs. If it cannot be avoided it is then recommended to play along with the ‘script’, as resisting the event associated with the object always results in death. If you find yourself in the event and are uncertain as to what to do, rely on your instincts and act like you are in a commercial. If you do survive the encounter, it is important to warn your friends and family of what they may encounter.

OMC12: The Trustworthy Mask

Location: Unknown.

Status: Unknown, presumed active.

Description and Behavior: The Trustworthy Mask is a white porcelain mask depicting a man with a relaxed expression and slight smile. The inside of the mask however is composed of rotting human flesh, maggots, and splintered bones that dig into the face of whoever wears it. When not worn it gives off a faint sound similar to a man mumbling to himself. Some have remarked that it sounds like it is saying “I said sorry, trust me”, “Eyes sore, must be”, or even “Isyd-Surstee” according to one person. This mumbling stops as soon as it is put on.

The main anomalous effect of the Trustworthy Mask is it makes any statement made by the wearer immediately and thoroughly believed. This includes even the most outlandish lies; for example, one person was convinced by a wearer of the mask that he himself did not exist. The other anomalous effects relate to how the mask affects the wearer. It induces a psychological dependency on the mask by convincing the wearer that they need the mask, or their lies will unravel and their life will fall apart. Once the person is wearing the mask on a permanent basis, the mask will over time erase the original personality of the wearer and replace it with another. The Trustworthy will repeat the process of replacing its wearer’s personality until they die.

Unfortunately, the location of the Trustworthy Mask is not known to us at PRAE. The mask was traced to several potential past wearers. Our research unfortunately reached a dead end with the esteemed billionaire Vincent Amnon. He told us that he did not have the mask, and that he was in fact not wearing at that moment. Regardless of this dead end, we will continue searching for it to inform and protect the public.

Recommended Actions: As the mask poses no real danger if not worn, and takes time to harm if worn, it is recommended to just ignore the Trustworthy Mask if encountered. The real danger is in the people who would misuse it. Therefore, remain vigilant of anyone in a porcelain mask matching the description. Avoid communications of any sort with them.

OHC8: Spider Sodas

Location: Convenience Stores and Vending Machines

Status: Active.

Description and Behavior: ‘Spider Sodas’ are seemingly normal cans or bottles of soft drink beverages of any brand, with the only distinguishing feature being that the ingredient list is written in an unknown language. When the supposed ‘soda’ contained within contacts human saliva it reacts by transforming the entire container of fluid into the most venomous local spider species. This occurs at a rate of one millilitre being equivalent to one spider regardless of size. Even if part of the liquid is poured in a separate glass the entirety of the soda will transform when the reaction occurs. Due to the nature of this anomalous reaction it is quite common for victims to receive spider bites on the inside of their mouths.

Recommended Actions: It is our recommendation to check all labels of soft drink beverages and dispose of any with suspicious ingredient lists. If you or someone in your proximity activates the reaction, remove the spiders from the mouth and vacate the area. Then be sure to get treated with antivenom. It may be necessary to bring in an exterminator to deal with the sudden infestation.

OHA5: The Familiar Corpse

Location: Usually inside residences or areas of low foot traffic.

Status: Active.

Description and Behavior: The Familiar Corpse is an incredibly dangerous entity, especially to anyone who is unaware of its effect. This effect is the entity’s ability to be perceived as being the dead body of whoever sees it. It is then that the affected individual will obsess over the corpse, behaving in a manner reminiscent of intense grieving. This manifests in the person remaining close to the entity, wondering aloud about how the death occurred. Often this continues for days, with the victim or victims neglecting their own needs to be by the entity’s side. The typical victim will die due to dehydration after a number of days. The situation becomes especially dangerous if the victim is strong enough to carry the entity away from the initial location allowing the effect to spread far further than is normally probable.

The effect the Familiar Corpse produces also manifests through pictures and video. If a person witnesses a picture or video of the entity, they will be filled with the intense desire to locate what they believe to be their own dead body. They will relentlessly pursue finding the body, often to their own detriment. The only people who can seemingly shake off the effect by the Familiar Corpse are people with a low self image. They frequently recognize the body as themselves but are able to move on.

Recommended Actions: Because of this entity’s ability to alter minds there is little that can be done in an encounter. It is known that persons with a high opinion of themselves and their abilities tend to react much more strongly to this entity and are less likely to survive. Therefore, the best course of action to maximize survival is to develop a modest sense of self.

OLC1: The Bust of the Goddess

Location: Unknown.

Status: Unknown, presumed active.

Description and Behavior: The Bust of the Goddess is an approximately two-foot (0.6 meter) tall bust depicting the head and shoulders of a woman of unknown ethnicity. Surviving descriptions of the Bust describe the woman in question as having deep gashes across the front off her face and three empty eye-sockets that seep a black fluid with the consistency of molasses but the smell of blood. Instead of hair, the head is said have five horns with ornamental carvings; though some claim there are up to twenty horns. It is said to change the expression on its face when not observed, and apparently can be heard breathing if carefully listened to.

The Bust was last known be in the possession of the now defunct Chained Gods Temple; a cult that believed the Bust to be both a depiction and conduit of their chief deity, the Chained Goddess. It was their belief that collecting the Bust and its missing eyes would allow the Chained Goddess and her allies to escape their captivity in their full forms to claim the earth as theirs. It is presumed that one of the various splinter groups formed from the surviving members of the Temple currently possess the Bust.

Persons known to have spent a significant amount of time in proximity to the Bust claim to develop the ability to hear it speak. Whether this is due to a degraded mental state or a genuine anomalous trait cannot be determined. What can be determined is the fact that the groups interested in this anomalous entity are willing and able to pursue it to radical lengths, presenting a danger whenever there is a rumor of its presence.

Recommended Actions: This anomalous entity is not, itself, dangerous if the records on it are to be regarded as accurate. At most, the Bust may cause some mental deterioration after prolonged exposure. The groups pursuing it are the real threat to your person. Therefore, it is recommended to ignore this entity and at most try to remain away from anywhere rumors indicate it may be. Instead, please report any rumors to us at PRAE so that we may investigate and learn more about this entity.